Man, I feel like a woman. If you’re tired and emotional, feeling overwhelmed all the time, and you’re always worried that you’re forgetting something, then you probably feel like a woman, too. Unfortunately, these are familiar feelings. I’ve seen a lot of posts about the power of women today, but I want to share the real feelings of this woman, in this moment.
It is a constant struggle to make time for myself. Tonight, I write this blog at almost midnight on a Sunday evening, after spending more than a few hours at my office. I couldn’t let the sun set on #InternationalWomensDay without at least acknowledging it. The truth is, I could’ve written my blog while the baby was napping today. Or I could’ve written my blog while he slept in this morning. During both his morning and afternoon snooze sessions, I was managing household responsibilities such as unloading the dishwasher or making a grocery list. Then, I took a nap! That’s right! I slept while the baby slept. That’s what so many wise women told me to do when I had him.
Sleep when he sleeps. But when should I chase my dreams? When can I exercise? If I sleep when he sleeps, when can I work on my personal growth and development? When can I make time for my husband? Whew! I’m more stressed now than when I started this topic. You get the point. Being a woman comes with a lot of anchors weighing you down in different times and at different weights.
One of my friends used the “four burner” analogy when we discussed this last year. She said you cannot possibly have all four burners (career, family, health, friends) on high all the time. You’ll run yourself ragged. In order to be successful, you have to turn one off. In order to be really successful, you have to turn two off. If I decide to prioritize myself, at what point can I put the toddler on the back burner (metaphorically speaking, of course)? Or, if we’re being honest, how long can a husband stay on the back burner without attention?
Y’all. I do not have the answers. I do, however, feel strongly that we have to find a community to connect with in order to survive these times. My community is the women in my life. I talk to my mom daily. She is one of many influential women in my life. She instilled certain values in me that I refuse to take for granted: humility, positivity, determination. Another woman I talk to almost daily? SSRN (She shall remain nameless). SSRN is a hard-working mother of two destined to quit smoking, stop yelling at her husband and live her best life. Our conversations consist mostly of sharing war stories.
“How was your day?” I asked her.
“Barely made it,” she answered.
If it’s not one thing it’s another. And that’s how we become consumed with anxiety. If not for the feeling of community, we may be tempted to give up. On this International Women’s Day, I want to remind all the women in my life to keep going. Even when it’s hard. Even when you feel pulled in several directions. Especially when you’re not sure if you can make it through. Keep going. I don’t know what’s on the other side of the hard thing you’re going through, but I do know there’s a community of women waiting to welcome you to their tribe.
tperrynola 